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The Universal Way
« on: February 03, 2018, 08:16:38 PM »
The scene opens to a sunny shot of two palm trees, which a rather classy fade in, the scene transitions to a man screwing around on his phone in some sort of corporate office. The big chair across from him looms over him with a shadow, blocking out the Florida sun and all the vitamin D that entail from it. The man takes a sip from a coffee mug sitting on the desk, a rather impressive mahogany black desk for that matter.

"Great, more wack jobs..."

The man lets out a comically loud groan as the door behind him opens.

"Mr. Stone, so glad you could join me today."

"But of course bossman."

The voice behind him lurches on to the screen. The man off screen is rather short, and round. But sporting a swanky looking business suit. The man in the swanky suit makes his way to the imposing chair, and takes a seat. Stone, who still hasn't looked up from his phone, snaps to attention as the business man tries to move his cup of coffee. Stone quickly yanks it up, holding the phone in one hand and the coffee cup in the other.

"Now Mr. Stone, do you know why we scheduled this appointment today?"

"It's crossed my mind a few times."

"Well."

The man pulls out a memo from his desk, on the front of it in large black letters are "F2W". The rest of the contents are blurred for legal reasons.

"Oh, that."

"Now Mr. Stone why would we receive something like this? It says you've signed a contract with this organization, Mr. Stone might I remind you that you are property of Universal Studios Resort. This could warrant breach of contract and end with an absolute end to your employment with us."

"It's not really a contract it's more..."


Tommy takes a moment to think while taking a sip of coffee, he finally puts his phone away as he places the coffee cup back on the desk and folds his hands.

"It's a partnership! You know how Disney has that swank deal with just about half the companies in the world? I thought I'd increase my network and make my professional umbrella just that much bigger."

"I'm getting a lot of buzz word Mr. Stone."

"No, no, not at all! Listen I got word from a buddy of mine in the business that this place is hot property. The stock in this place is practically golden... so I reached out using my connections and set up a little deal between the two of us. Very lucrative, we get like 80% of the merchandising rights. Plus they feed us an ample amount of competitors to fight, it's a win/win."

The man in the chair takes another look at the contract, before shaking his head again. A look of stoic disinterest is growing more prevalent on his face as Tommy looks back at his phone.

"These... competitors that we've seen are hardly the sort of characters we want in our parks."

"Sure they aren't Shrek or the Blues Brothers, but people want variety when they go on vacation you know? They want to see things they haven't seen before, see things that they can't see at home. You know they say hospitality is the business of intangible assets right? Just look at the parks, minus gift shops and food, what do we sell? Entertainment and memories!"

Tommy drops the phone to look at the business man, who still has a look of iron on his face.

"Besides I've seen the Q2 reports, while Disney was at capacity during peak week, we will flying just fine weren't we? We need to get these people back, remember when Harry Potter world opened? For the first time since the 90s we beat Magic Kingdom! We beat the shit out of the mouse, that other... wrestling company left and there is a gap to fill."

"The only gap you need to fill is the dead zone between Harry Potter world and Seuss Land."

"And that's what I'm doing!"

Still skeptical over the entire thing, the business man eyeballs the contract looking for any and all loopholes.

"And what about the dates you are away, it says here that you will have to wrestle in places outside our domain."

"They broadcast it to us, for free, we play it in the bars on City Walk. See I'm thinking twenty steps ahead boss."

"Well, for now I suggest that you tread lightly Mr. Stone. At UVSRO, we strive to give our guests that most memorable experience that they can, if for whatever reason you choose to go against that grain, not only will you be fired, but blacklisted in the entertainment industry, am I clear."

"Crystal, Mr... what was your name again?"

"You don't need to know that."

And with that, the man signals for Tommy to leave the room. Tommy picks up his mug of coffee and leaves, glad to just make it out with his skin intact. The screen fades to black as Tommy pulls out his phone, walking out of camera view.


The scene opens to the funstastic world of Universal Studios! The crowds of people all look happy and rather hot as the Florida sun beats down on them. You can almost smell the sweat and sunscreen. Sticking out like a sore thumb in the middle of the crowd is Tommy Stone. Tommy is throwing fliers at people, his own form of "marketing".

"Come on folks! Come see the new spectacular show sweeping the land! f2W wrestling! Admission is free with a valid park ticket! Find us right next to Posidon's Fury! You gotta pass us to get to Harry Potter Land!"

Tommy drops the remainder of the flyers on the ground, he takes a sip from his water bottle, probably the first water he's drank in years. The Florida sun has a way of bringing out the most desperate actions in men of course.

"I was a god damn world champion at one point, now I'm begging people to come see me in the opening match. Florida's Finest is stuck fighting a ninja and whatever the fuck Angelo is. I've fought in a prison, a mental hospital, the best stadiums in the world... but this gonna be a first. I've got to come out of the gate swinging with this one, I don't think the big wigs up in the head office are gonna be too happy with their hottest new property underselling. I'm afraid I'm gonna get the Jaws treatment if this doesn't go well. "The Universal Way" they call it, three days of orientation just to be able to wrestle in the park, some bullshit if you ask me."

He sits down on a bench overlooking the giant lake in the middle of Universal Studios, the statue of chief wiggum lurking in the background. Tommy whips out his sunglasses, the sun getting to be too much for his eyes.

"Spent the majority of my life looking at this sun, always looking to the sky."

Letting out a deep sigh after his attempt at being deep.

"I wonder if this is how people see me, just one big star up in the sky that's unobtainable for the average man. The bar that is just set too high."

A disgusting smirk grows on his face, he rubs his chin, scratching the 5 o'clock shadow in the most manly way he could.

"Is this how Sybyl and Angelo view Florida's Finest? I mean what a run of bad luck they must be on. I know Sybyl had his first match already, but I mean really he was fighting a bunch of no named punks. No this time he has to face the man himself... and Angelo. He's gotta have it lurking in the back of his mind that Tommy Stone has beaten him before, that he doesn't possibly have a chance against me. Which means I gotta be extra careful that he doesn't try and pull a fast one on Florida's Finest and just pin Angelo."

The beginning bars of All Star by Smash Mouth is heard coming from somewhere, Tommy reaches in his pocket and pulls out his phone. He holds it up after investigating the number to his ear.

"Snuggle Bunny! How are you?"

That disgusting smirk fades fast from Tommy's face, the voice on the other end is just barely too quiet to hear.

"Dearest I signed the contract as a surprise to you! I thought you'd be so happy that we get free tickets to Universal Studios now!... I know a season pass would have done the same thing but we get discounts!..."

Tommy hunches over as he absorbs the verbal ass chewing he's currently receiving. The people walking by whisper amongst themselves as forms of expletives can obviously be heard on that end.

"Dearest, I've got this, besides it's not like we have much of the choice. Florida's Finest is at the top of his game! I'm even drinking water like I told you, already down 3 bottles today!"

This was a lie, he had only drank about a quarter of a bottle, the sip he had taken at the beginning of the segment.

"Helena it's gonna be ok! Just calm down."

Having just committed the carnal sin of all relationships, Tommy puts his hand on his head as his wife just yells louder.

"I know I should have run it by you, but it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission, you know?"

Helena got quiet, also never a good sign.

"I get it, you're worried."

Tommy tugs on his knee.

"I'm not exactly young anymore, but I'm like a fine wine, I'm only gonna keep getting better."

This was another lie, only through an extensive use of painkillers can Tommy function as a wrestler.

"Just give it some time, you're gonna love this, plus whenever you get time off we can go dick around the theme parks, ok?"

Tommy looks on as the flyers scatter in the wind, Tommy lets out a small smile as he hangs up the phone. The scene once again fades to black as Tommy continues drinking coffee, as the hot Florida sun shines brightly off the center of the lake.


The scene cuts to Tommy Stone standing in a ring, the sights and sounds of Universal are blurred and muted as the camera focuses clearly on him. The ring itself has the UV logo all over the place, with F2W being seen in small print in the corner. Tommy is in full ring gear as the blurred faces of tourist pass by him. Tommy points to one of the turnbuckles, which lets out a small firework, Tommy blows on his finger as if shooting a gun. Tommy walks to the corner of the ring where his coffee mug is, he takes a sip and is handed a microphone.

"You see that? Nothing but the best!"

One of the speakers for the microphone temporarily cuts out, only to quickly be fixed as Tommy pauses, only continuing after being given the thumbs up.

"The finest ladies and gentleman! Whenever F2W comes to Universal that's what you can expect! The finest action, the finest entertainment, and the finest wrestler in the world! Come witness the extravaganza that can only be seen at Universal Studios Orlando! Come witness the greatest ass kicking this side of I-4! I feel bad for my opponents I really do, Florida's Finest is no ordinary fighter! I've got the ability to come at ya through every single angle, I've got more moves then the dictionary! I've been around the world and back and I've won just about every single title I wanted to, but we'll come back to me, let's talk about my opponents!"

Tommy is handed a small notecard from a man in a universal studios T-shirt.

"Um..."

*Off mic* "Why the hell am I reading this?"

The man shrugs at Tommy, who shakes his head and lets out a huff.

"It seems that they want me to alert you the Incredible Hulk coaster is down for maintenance."

Tommy rips up the card and takes another sip of coffee.

"AS I WAS SAYING, about my opponents. Angelo looks like a scary son of a bitch, I actually had to google him on my phone before I came out here tonight, not too much on him, but I found a picture and by God that man needs to get out in the sun more. Seriously he just looks angry, that's not good for the health man! Good thing we're in beauty Orlando where he can soak up all the rays he wants, maybe go meet some of the beautiful Florida girls we have around here, sure they're crazy as shit, but they look good."

A passerby flips off Tommy, who replies by returning the hand gesture.

"See, that's just the way us Floridian's great each other. Hell Angelo why not just lay back and let all your worries fade away, I mean you're gonna be laying down anyways after I beat your ass into the ground. While you're down there just stay there, maybe then you won't look like someone just pissed in your cereal."

Tommy runs his hand through his head, mentally refreshing himself.

"And now for the matter of Sybyl, who to be frank, is trying WAY too hard to live the whole "dark and mysterious" gimmick. Listen pal you ain't fooling any of us, I know underneath that mask and mysterious act that you're just another two bit wrestler with a third bit act. Didn't you lose to me way back in the day? Back in Brutal Force? Yeah..yeah... see I remember, your ass was lurking around the ashes after the arena burnt to the ground. When we get into the ring it's gonna be the same result."

Once again, a man in a universal shirt hands him a notecard. Tommy struggles not to take it, but gives in.

"It appears the Hulk ride is back up!"

*Off mic* "Dude it's been 5 minutes."

The man shrugs again, this time Tommy doesn't even bother ripping up the card, just dropping it in the ring.

"Boys it's just simple tactics! I've got the home field advantage, I know the turf, the layout of the land, I know where to park, which trust me is gonna be the biggest issue you guys have. What's gonna happen when those two have to step out into the sun? This isn't an abandoned theme park, this isn't a casino, baby this is 90 degree, packed as hell, as humid as a sauna Florida! Do you see that puddle?"

Tommy points to a small puddle outside the ring, the camera zooms in on it.

"Someone just dropped that ice cream, not only do you have to fight that, but this entire theme park can be our arena! We may start off in the ring, but it can end up anywhere! How are you gonna take getting suplexed into a roller coaster? It's gonna suck dude, but you know what? Come on down boys, let me show you the Universal Way! Let me show you the kind of experience that you can only have once in a while, the experience of getting your ass kicked by Florida's Finest Tommy Stone."

He takes one last sip of coffee, he turns the mug upside down, showing it's all out.

"Gentlemen, you will be the stepping stone for me, that first cobble step to the top of F2W. My shoulder's been awfully cold lately, and that Melee Championship looks awful nice. Now I don't know about all the movers and shakers around here, but I do know one thing, that they need to watch out for Florida's Finest, because once I set my sights on something, it's damn near impossible to stop me from getting it."

Tommy makes a belt motion around his waist, Tommy drops the microphone and rolls out of the ring, as "Alpha Dog" by Fall Out Boy plays in the outro, before the Universal Studios logo appear on screen.