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Brennan Devlin

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"The Death of Brennan Devlin."
« on: December 25, 2017, 10:03:44 PM »

    • We pick right up with a very special Brennan Devlin, but not the Brennan Devlin.  No, we open with one who made an appearance last time we saw Brennan.  This man exists in a parallel world where Brennan Devlin had never been a heel professional wrestler, but instead had become a 'Face', an actual Face Devlin.  In his dimension, many things were the reverse of how we knew it.  John Blade had become world-renowned for his wrestling ability, brilliant physicist and science man Hubert Smalls had just been elected President of the United States and more.

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “What a nice day, huh Ramona?”

      He walked along with Ramona through a fancy looking garden.  Everything was bright like you'd expect in a depiction of a world where most things were perfect.

      GOOD RAMONA
      “Oh definitely, everything's so much better since President Hubert ordered all heel professional wrestlers be killed.  Who needed Zack Fantana and his center for Hitler youths anyway?”

      Remember, opposites.

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “And now the nicest wrestling company in the world, 4 Corners Wrestling, who don't like weed or football at all and never fight or argue on twitter can thrive.”

      GOOD RAMONA “Oh my god Brennan I know, why do you need to state the obvious so much?”

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “Oh I'm sorry, I was distracted checking my tweets and seeing Bronx yelling at this Live from the Sun jerk.”

      Live from the Sun..  and then there was Live from the Moon.  Okay, this was starting to make sense.

      GOOD RAMONA “If only Bryan were really from the sun, I'd want him to burn.”

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “Same.”

      Okay, so some things didn't change as much here as anywhere else.  Either way, they kept walking along when from the bushes nearby, a gentleman in a black shroud stepped out.  He stood out like a sore thumb in the brightly colored, happy parallel reality.

      “Hello.”

      The man stated in a garbled voice as if he were speaking through some sort of device that would change his tone.  Face Devlin turned around and gave him a shocked look.

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “Okay bucko, who in the pink flamingo heck are you?”

      GOOD RAMONA
      “Yeah, how do you know we weren't out here making whoopie?”

      She said all up in arms, the woman was a total prude after all.  Known for her #SelfRespectSunday tweets and oh did she never miss #WomanRespectWednesday.

      “Whoopie?  …  I hate this place already.  Allow me to illuminate you both on my presence here, though..”

      While his voice was being changed, filtered, he spoke with a calm dialogue, far too calm to be doing what he was doing.  Very polite in his demeanor.

      GOOD RAMONA
      “Brennan, run, I'll handle this guy with my Outfront Punt..”

      She uttered as she went at him for a kick, only for him to immediately no sell and shove her on her behind.

      GOOD RAMONA
      “That's impossible, nobody has ever avoided that..”

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “Listen Ramona..  you run..”

      GOOD RAMONA
      “No..  I have to save you.”

      Brennan helped her up and glared at the figure walking towards them, he was brandishing a blade now and Devlin knew what was about to happen.

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “You already saved me, you saved me from becoming like those other Brennan's..”

      GOOD RAMONA
      “...  I love you.”

      Devlin looked back at the man, then back at her.  He knew his end was near, but he had lived a long, good life.

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “I know, now run.”

      Ramona ran off, looking back as Brennan confronted his assailant, walking up towards him bravely. 

      'FACE' DEVLIN
      “Okay you woman of ill repute, lets have at it!”

      With a stab and a twist, Brennan yelled out and collapsed to the ground.  Then an odd stream of energy or bad special effects flowed from Devlin into the shrouded man and he turned and began walking away.  The corpse of the good Brennan Devlin lying on the ground.


      “AHHH!”

      RAMONA:
      “Brennan, what the fuck..”

      He awoke in bed running a sweat, screaming.  He had seen..  things.  Things where Ramona and he were all gay as fuck and then, he was murdered!

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Shit..  sorry, go back to bed.” 

      RAMONA:
      “You sure?”

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Yeah you have to get some stuff done for your foot fetish site tomorrow, I'm gonna go check on Tinkles and Gary, then I'll come back to bed.”

      She nodded as he stood up and walked down the hall, sighing as he walked to the end of the hall to an extra bathroom.  He stepped inside and rubbed his eyes, leaning down over his sink and splashing his face with water.  Above him in the mirror, the masked 'Faceless' Devlin watched as if he were standing in the room, his reflection apparent as Brennan caught something out of the corner of his eye..  He rose up quickly and nothing was there but his own reflection.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “...”

      He didn't even know anymore.  He had been in this odd haze where some of the things he had seen were getting hard to believe.  While many would call him delusional, the oddness that surrounds him, the yammering he had been some sort of space wizard from another dimension had been in jest..  right?  He couldn't explain Freight Train and Vontavio saying he was talking about nothing too.

      He traversed his way into his lounge, seeing Gary sitting in his computer chair and he let out a sigh.  Gary was the dog he liked the least of the two, the two being Tinkles and Gary.  The tiny white Pomeranian were almost identical and yet Devlin had always said that it was 'Tinkles world and Gary was simply living in it', that Tinkles was the star and deep down, deep down he knew Gary was jealous of this.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “God damnit Gary, out of my chair.”

      Gary would remove himself from the chair and walk away, then the dog slowly glanced back at him as Brennan sat down.  Devlin slowly looked out of the corner of his eye as the dog swiftly turned and walked out.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “...  Could of swore Gary was just glaring at me.”

      Devlin turned into his computer, a fancy gaming desktop he had set up with some bright pink and blue neon lights shining out of the case.  He moved his mouse only to find his computer had been already awake, no lock screen prompting him to sign in as he usually had set.  It had already been logged into.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “...”

      Had Gary?.  No, couldn't be.  Maybe Ramona had been in here updating her fans or something earlier.  He shrugged as he sat there and began typing in various searches on DuckDuckGo, as Brennan didn't utilize anything Google related due to their retaining certain data he was uncomfortable with.  Brennan would type in such keywords as 'space stuff', 'space pants', 'fifth dimension', but inevitably get sidetracked by pictures of cute cats.

      He fucking fell asleep again.  His selective narcolepsy had been acting up badly.

      A loud thump was heard and Brennan broke out down the hall, seeing Freight Train and Vontavio with bats having kicked in the front door.  They were being attacked by Tinkles and Gary who were fighting them, but Train and Vontavio kept them back by wildly swinging.

      FREIGHT TRAIN:
      “We know you have Ramona's corpse here or to a lesser extent Ramon's!  You thought you had us tricked but you had a house on this land somewhere!”

      VONTAVIO:
      “Yeah!  We thought this was your neighbor!”

      Devlin was perplexed at this and for good reason.  Where did they think he lived?  Where did they think he pooped for that matter?  The church had a lot of things but it wasn't functional as a home.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “You thought I was like, living in that church?  The fuck am I – some sort of generic nineties comic book anti hero?”

      That was more Crow Devlin's thing anyway, he thought to himself, before realizing they wouldn't grasp the reference.   Vontavio pushed past, going upstairs while Freight Train tried to fight the vicious beasts that were Tinkles and Gary, fear registering on his face as he knew his life was on the line if he were to be attacked by the hellhounds.

      VONTAVIO:
      “SHE'S ALIVE.”

      FREIGHT TRAIN:
      “What?”

      Ramona walked down the steps as Vontavio backed down them, and she glanced around in confusion.  Yep, Ramona was alive, if they'd checked their fucking twitters they'd have known that.

      RAMONA:
      “..  I've literally been out here most of this whole time guys, what the fuck..”

      FREIGHT TRAIN:
      “So..  he didn't kill you..”

      There she was, standing there in the flesh and obviously not as dead as any of them had expected.  So that definitely meant Ramon was gone, right?

      RAMONA:
      “I'm real guys, look at me, not dead.”

      Vontavio walked up and began grabbing her boobs, feeling them up for a long time.

      VONTAVIO:
      “These are fake, this is definitely Ramona.”

      RAMONA:
      “Hey!”

      Ramona was surprised by the intrusive actions of the hairdresser as he immediately backed off and looked around.  If Ramona was alive, that meant Ramon had to be the dead one.  But..  what else was going on here?  Why would anyone hurt poor, sweet Ramon?!

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Guys..”

      They were all arguing back and forth about Ramon being missing when Brennan looked back at them.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Guys!”

      An odd ringing was occurring in his head as he began stumbling, then suddenly collapsed to the ground as Vontavio came flying towards him.  Protective instinct taking over as he began checking him out, the ringing had gotten so loud it seemingly sent Devlin into a state of unconsciousness.  Devlin laid on the ground as Freight Train and Vontavio attempted to move him, meanwhile, Ramona just looked on and sighed.  It was always something around here.

      Somewhere, somewhere deep in Brennan Devlin's mind.

      He stood in a dark, dark field, a bright neon glow at the end of the path, glowing over top of the elevated land as Brennan himself approached.  Devlin looked around, confused.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “What the fuck?  Where am I?  Everyone?”

      In the shadows, various white masks, those belonging to the so-called 'Faceless' henchmen he employed began popping up, just outside of the illuminated path.  He could see them and it was sufficiently creepy, he thought to himself as he walked up the small hill to see..  'Faceless' Devlin standing nearby in a field of flowers.  'Faceless' Devlin reach out towards a rose planted in the ground only for the plant life around it to begin wilting away, dying upon his touch.

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “I see you're awake.”

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “I thought you, all of those other 'you's', I thought you disappeared, became a part of me..”

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “That was a show of support from our little conglomerate, our congregation..  although now, we require something from you, Brennan..”

      Brennan was confused, they required something of him?  What could he do for a group of well, himself that he still questioned if they were even real or not?!

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “If I have to fuck anything you can count me out right now.”

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “Why would..  no you insufferable idiot, our kind is being killed one by one..”

      The dark version of the Face of Wrestling seemed to have his patience wearing thin and for good reason, he was here for something truly important and Brennan was making it into some kind of joke!

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “White people?  I always knew it would come to this.  RACE WAR!  WE'RE GONNA HAVE A RACE WAR!!!!!!!!”

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “Silence!..  the Brennan Devlin's of the multiverse have been being slaughtered, this is not a joke.  The good 'Face' Devlin, the British 'King' Brennan Devlin, and even the homosexual Brennan Devlin of Earth 69.  All wiped from their existences and we believe it is only the beginning..”

      Not the Homosexual Brennan Devlin of Earth 69!  This was serious, thought Devlin as he glanced onward.  His ears still ringing from the earlier hellish noise that had seemingly knocked him out and brought him here.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “But who would want to kill me?  or...   other me's?”

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “We believe the goal is simple, to wipe out Brennan Devlin from space and time..  keep your eyes open, we will be in touch..  and remember, consider this a warning..”

      A warning?  Brennan looked surprised.  Why was he being warned?  Was he in danger like those other guys?  Why him?!  Why not mask face over here?  This was concerning and Devlin was already freaking out a bit more than he should have been.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Wait, they're after me too?  There's a psycho killer on the loose and you just leave me with that?!”

      ’FACELESS’ DEVLIN
      “We'll be in touch.”

      …  Then he awoke on the ground, looking around in surprise as Vontavio was coming down at him with his lips puckered.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “AHHHH, HELL BEASTS ARE ATTACKING ME!”

      Devlin jumped up in a fighting stance as if he had been ready to kill, Freight Train and Vontavio seemingly just assumed he had seen the stuff of unimaginable horrors while he was unconscious.  But the truth was worse than that.

      VONTAVIO:
      “...  He thought he was in hell.”

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “No you were just trying to kiss me.”

      Devlin rose up and looked around, sighing as he looked to his 'help'.  They hadn't even been hired back and they were here to help him, they liked him and something about that was wrong to Brennan.  He had been so mean to them and here they were, sacrificing their own time and energy to try to figure out what the hell was going on with him?  It was kind of nice if they weren't being weirdos themselves all the time..  though sure you could argue they were also here for Pete, but, he'd been missing for a bit now anyway and no one seemed too worried.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “I have things I need to handle.  Sorry..”

      Devlin scurried off, still acting strange, still keeping secrets.  He had a big F2W match coming up and now, now someone was apparently out to kill him?  Well, someone else?  This was getting to be too much, whatever could the Face of Wrestling do?  He couldn't put anyone else at risk, he had to figure this out himself.


      Before long we open up inside of the 'Altar', the church that Brennan had refashioned into a sort of monument dedicated to himself.  It was a holy land if your religion happened to be deeply rooted in the worship of the self-proclaimed Face of Professional Wrestling, or as he had most recently called himself, the Foundation of Fight 2 Win.  The beautiful sounds of orchestral music played in the background as Brennan conducted, only for the odd visage of there being only floating instruments on the stage.  All of them immediately dropping to the floor as Brennan turned to acknowledge the cameras.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Everyone keeps suggesting something isn't right with me as of late..

      That there's something different in the way I handle things, the way I see the world around me, everyone seems to suggest there's something wrong..  But the truth is that there's something wrong with each and every one of you.  I am perfectly fine, in fact, I see things clearer than I ever had before.  I see the cracks, I see the things that other athletes in our business struggle to see.  I have had my mind opened to a whole new realm, I have ascended beyond each and every member of the F2W roster to something bigger, something better, something beyond.

      No, there's something wrong with all of you.

      For all of my career, I've been the 'weird' one, I've been looked down upon by my so-called 'peers' for daring to be different.  I am beyond some generic, cocky villain, I am beyond being a hero, I am beyond good and evil in general.  I'm something more, I've always been something more and now?  No, my purpose has always been clear and for a time, my vision was clouded to the point that I didn't see it.  I'm here to provide balance.  I'm here to maintain the status quo, I'm here to rid this company, this business of supposed 'female wrestlers', I'm here to show you all that 'heroes' like Fantana are a sham. 

      Before you say it, you did beat me once already Zack!  You did, congratulations.

      Applause all around – but here's the thing.  I don't think you can do it twice.  In fact, I know you cannot.  You beat me and you had an opportunity, you had a chance to ascend and reach even greater heights..  and you know what you did?  You know what happened when you had a chance not to choke?  You choked, bud.  You had one big victory over the Face of Professional Wrestling and you...  immediately lost right after.  If it had been me, if I had that opportunity, I would have succeeded, I would have beaten Natalie King but you stole my opportunity from me.

      I'm going to beat you and the rest in this match tonight, and then?  Then I'm going to take an opportunity, I'm going to take the Melee Championship and save us all.”


      Devlin revealed his plans, though it was somewhat obvious he intended to acquire the gold eventually.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “But I can't count my chickens before I hatch, what about the rest of the people in the match?  I know, I know.  What about Starlight, Brennan?  …  What about Starlight?  Starlight, not so bright, I'll snuff out her flames tonight.  You're supposed to be all spooky, I get it, you throw on some face paint, spit a few mists, act a little wild and crazy and everyone's supposed to believe you're a force to be reckoned with.  But consider me enlightened in a way most aren't because I just see another scared little girl, a little girl playing pretend, a little girl who slapped on a bad makeup job and has gotten in over her head.

      You've been immediately thrown into the deep in, Starlight, and I'm going to drag you under and ensure you drown.

      This brings me to Angie Vaughn..  why are you even here?  Why are you in this match?  I beat you, I destroyed you, I embarrassed you.  All that talk, all of that hype about how you were going to take out the misogynistic Brennan Devlin and then you lost.  You lost.. Every time you lose, I see you on twitter crying about how you failed again, so do you want to know a spoiler, Angie?  A little secret that I'm sure I can share, just between you and me?  After Melee is over after it's all said and done?  You're going to be tweeting how you failed again, how you lost, again. 

      That's a spoiler, by the way.”


      Devlin sat down on the stage area in the church, looking into the camera briefly as he began to consider the one other opponent he had yet to acknowledge.  One man in particular who while down on his luck could be considered as much of a wild card as Devlin himself.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Then that leaves.  Adam Wolfe.  Now you, my friend, you are a hard one to predict, a hard one to wrap my head around.  See, for anyone else, that puppet thing would be a complete and total joke but you...  you make it work, you utilize them in interesting ways and in a lot of ways, we're both similarly a little nuts.  See, where some would laugh and consider your habits to be joke worthy, I see the truth, you're just as viable of an opponent as anyone else in this match, just as dangerous.  Unlike most, I will not be taking my eye off of you as a result, because I've learned the strange, the different, the odd?  In this business, that's exactly what it takes to get you ahead, to get you on top.

      You're different, Adam.

      But you're not different in the sense that you'll be one of the ones to succeed against me.  You're a master of puppets, you're a master of pulling the strings..  but there are no strings on me, Adam.  Every last time you've stepped in the ring here in F2W, you've been met with failure...  Tonight will not be any different.  But don't be sad, don't be sad at all, Adam.  There's going to you and three others in this match, all with one thing in common.  You all failed and left one man standing, one light shining in the darkness, one man standing in the void of despair that is created by all of your losses.

      That man will be me.  I will stand there as a shining beacon to show the world that to cap off the year of 2017?  Brennan Devlin will be heading into 2018 as this companies future..”


      Devlin paused as he let out a chuckle, the light undertone of 'I Am the Future' by Alice Cooper blaring, a particular emphasis on the lyric 'take a look at my face, I am the future and the world belongs to me..'  before he briefly spoke to someone off the screen.

      BRENNAN DEVLIN
      “Wait, it's at a mystery location?  How do I even know where the fuck to travel to?  How are any of us getting there?  How..  how are we supposed to show up to a mystery location?  That makes no sense!”

      Devlin sighed and walked off, he had to go figure this out.  How was he supposed to travel to a location he had no idea of?  This was going to prove to be a rather perplexing situation, how could you find a location that hadn't been disclosed to you, to begin with?!


      Nearby, Vontavio, Freight Train, and Ramona were discussing Brennan and his strange antics.

      VONTAVIO:
      “He ran off claiming someone was out to kill him..”

      RAMONA:
      “People always want to kill him.”

      FREIGHT TRAIN:
      “Nobody wants to kill him Ramona, he's lost it..”

      Slowly we see in a nearby room, the room Brennan had been using a computer in earlier in the evening.  The chair was turned towards the computer, whoever was in it obscured.  A charming British voice speaking out.  Was that Michael Caine or just a terrible impersonation?

      VOICE:
      “Yes old chap, I'll kill him shortly..  they'll never see me coming..  Yes.  It's all coming according to plan and soon, soon we will have erased the most important Brennan Devlin..”

      Slowly the chair turned to reveal a tiny white Pomeranian sitting in it.  Gary..  Gary was killing the Brennan Devlin's of the multiverse?!  Gary's eyes flashed red, the tiny dog having been revealed to perhaps be the mastermind behind everything that had gone on thus far.

      GARY:
      “Cheerio, old boy..”

      The camera closed in on the eyes of the tiny dog as the piece came to a close with the dog ending its skype call.  The tiny dog remaining in place as a voice over was heard as we freeze frame on its face. 

      “I met him, years ago. I was told there was nothing left; no reason, no conscience, no understanding; and even the most rudimentary sense of life or death, of good or evil, right or wrong.  I met this dog with this blank, pale, emotionless face, and the blackest eyes... the devil's eyes..”
      - Gary's dog whisperer, early 2016.